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BCE
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BCE
«
on:
September 01, 2010, 06:19:11 PM »
by
bodkin
Everybody is supposed to be dead,
to never say anything or want anything ever again.
-- Kurt Vonnegut,
Slaughterhouse-Five
Time happened so long ago.
The milkman's note is deep carved
dead-language, symbolic, on the door frame.
Evidence for breakfast can still be sifted
from the archaeological layer:
people ate toasted grains, bread,
fruit preserved in storage jars.
They may have wanted extra pints
which the milkman didn't leave.
If I still spoke that language
I would pull messages from shards,
write a learned paper, a coffee table book,
show how civilisation faltered
a voice was raised
a door was slammed...
It was all over long ago --
I make notes with detachment.
Logged
In fifteen minutes everybody famous will be in the future...
Re: BCE
«
Reply #1 on:
September 01, 2010, 06:50:47 PM »
by
Tom Riordan
I get a haunting picture of a long absent Creator, who has forgotten the language and much else about what he neglectfully made eons before.
Quote from: bodkin on September 01, 2010, 06:19:11 PM
Everybody is supposed to be dead,
to never say anything or want anything ever again.
-- Kurt Vonnegut,
Slaughterhouse-Five
Time happened so long ago.
The milkman's note is deep carved
dead-language, symbolic, on the door frame.
Evidence for breakfast can still be sifted
from the archaeological layer:
people ate toasted grains, bread,
fruit preserved in storage jars.
They may have wanted extra pints
which the milkman didn't leave.
If I still spoke that language
I would pull messages from shards,
write a learned paper, a coffee table book,
show how civilisation faltered
a voice was raised
a door was slammed...
It was all over long ago --
I make notes with detachment.
Logged
Re: BCE
«
Reply #2 on:
September 01, 2010, 07:04:28 PM »
by
larry jordan
Love the feeling sensed from the read of this. A meddling thought, please discard as appropriate, but my senses want to change S4 to:
If I still spoke that language,
I would piece a message
back together, write
Excellent,
larry
a coffee table book.
Logged
Re: BCE
«
Reply #3 on:
September 01, 2010, 07:51:06 PM »
by
Tiko Lewis
i'm going to leave this here for a
while to allow others to comment;
then, i'm going o pick this.
i enjoyed.
tiko
Logged
...i don't eat jelly beans afterward.
Re: BCE
«
Reply #4 on:
September 01, 2010, 09:45:39 PM »
by
Tiko Lewis
i'm not known for my patience
or my memory.
to picks.
tiko
Logged
...i don't eat jelly beans afterward.
Re: BCE
«
Reply #5 on:
September 03, 2010, 10:29:44 AM »
by
Lynn Doiron
fine write. Love the milkman S with the "may have wanted" and "didn't leave" image, and how that somehow bends so well to the "voice raised" and "door slammed" lines.
i like larry's suggestion above. one way or another "shards" seems out of date. i'm more often wrong then right, however.
ld
Logged
My blogs:
http://lwww.lynndoiron.wordpress.com
for memoir/journal/poetry
Re: BCE
«
Reply #6 on:
September 03, 2010, 11:14:06 AM »
by
bodkin
Thanks Tom...
and thanks Tiko!!!
Larry / Lynn - "shards" is one of those words over- and mis-used in poetry (I know at least one contemporary poet who considers it banned) but in this context, e.g. archaeology, it is unusually 100% correct. Shards are pieces of broken pot, and very much the archaeologist's stock-in-trade...
Ian
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In fifteen minutes everybody famous will be in the future...
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