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  we were at
« on: June 08, 2009, 02:47:45 PM » by John Yamrus
we were at

the hotel bar,
ordering drinks.

i got
tequila for me
and she wanted
something pink,

so i asked for
a strawberry colada.

the waitress looked at me
and said,
“we don’t serve
daiquiris.”

i looked at her
and ordered a wine
instead.

there was live music
at the bar…

the Jerry Stein Trio.

there were
two of them.

right then
they were playing
the old Patsy Cline hit
“Crazy.”

they were playing it
real slow and
it was kinda nice.

maybe it was
the tequila…

but it was nice.

one of the guys
at the bar,
who hadn’t said a word
all night,
turned to me and said,
“they’re playing
an Eagles song.  i
love the Eagles. 
that’s Desperado. 

i know that damn song
by heart.”

that’s just the kind
of night it was.

nothing seemed to fit.

some nights are like that.

some nights you just
lower your head,
deal with it
and take one
for the team.

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  Re: we were at
« Reply #1 on: June 08, 2009, 02:56:45 PM » by ca.leverette
This is true, quirky, humorous, and kinda funny-strange.  Just like you say--like one of those days or nights you are speechless to explain or understand why things are happening the way they are.  We all have them.

Good subject, good write,
cheryl
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"A poem begins as a lump in the throat, a sense of wrong, a homesickness, a lovesickness." ~ Robert Frost

  Re: we were at
« Reply #2 on: June 08, 2009, 03:08:20 PM » by Jerry Pike
i do love your writing john,,a super piece.....small glitch    and..eagles song    an i think

keep it up...well done with the you tubing

jerry
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  Re: we were at
« Reply #3 on: June 08, 2009, 03:43:07 PM » by John Yamrus
i do love your writing john,,a super piece.....small glitch    and..eagles song    an i think

keep it up...well done with the you tubing

jerry


thanks for pointing out the typo!  i really appreciate that.  i hate having things go out with mistakes.
best.
jy
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  Re: we were at
« Reply #4 on: June 08, 2009, 04:08:02 PM » by milner place
In great voice, John, beautifully sung to rippling laughter at ourselves. Will be picked.

milner
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'Caminante, no hay camino,
se hace camino al andar'
- Antonio Machado

Latest book 'naked invitation' $15 or £10, p&p inc milnerplace@msn.com

  Re: we were at
« Reply #5 on: June 08, 2009, 04:53:11 PM » by Tom Riordan
we were at

the hotel bar,
ordering drinks.

i got
tequila for me
and she wanted
something pink,

so, i asked for
a strawberry colada.

the waitress looks at me
and says
“we don’t serve
daiquiris.”

i looked at her
and ordered a wine
instead.

there was live music
at the bar…

the Jerry Stein Trio.

there were
two of them.

right then
they were playing
the old Patsy Cline hit
“Crazy”.

they were playing it
real slow and
it was kinda nice.

maybe it was
the tequila…

but it was nice.

one of the guys
at the bar,
who hadn’t said a word
all night,
turned to me and said
“they’re playing
and Eagles song.  i
love the Eagles. 
that’s Desperado. 

i know that damn song
by heart.”

that’s just the kind
of night it was.

nothing seemed to fit.

some nights are like that.

some nights you just
lower your head,
deal with it
and take one
for the team.

Fun read, John! L3 unnecessary? Tom
Logged

  Re: we were at
« Reply #6 on: June 08, 2009, 06:21:53 PM » by larry jordan
Finally hanging out with real people, are you? tsk, tsk

fun read.

larry
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  Re: we were at
« Reply #7 on: June 08, 2009, 07:00:34 PM » by Jay Dougherty
Love this section:

there was live music
at the bar…

the Jerry Stein Trio.

there were
two of them.
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I do not like to write. I like to have written. --Gloria Steinam

  Re: we were at
« Reply #8 on: June 09, 2009, 12:59:33 AM » by Rick Stansberger
I like this a lot.
Rick
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Rick's fifth book is out:  Gizmo--love, loss and the passion to know--in the first part of the last century.

  Re: we were at
« Reply #9 on: June 09, 2009, 08:13:42 PM » by Lavonne Westbrooks
good 'un.
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  Re: we were at
« Reply #10 on: June 09, 2009, 08:27:21 PM » by Lynn Doiron
Like it, too, John.

Is 'and Eagles' intended or 'an Eagles' ?

ld
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My blogs:
http://lwww.lynndoiron.wordpress.com for memoir/journal/poetry

  Re: we were at
« Reply #11 on: June 09, 2009, 09:28:34 PM » by John Yamrus
thanks, lynn...i thought i'd corrected that typo...thanks for pointing it out.  glad you caught it.
best...
john
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  Re: we were at
« Reply #12 on: June 10, 2009, 02:01:00 PM » by Lynn Doiron
glad to read this one again. 

ld
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My blogs:
http://lwww.lynndoiron.wordpress.com for memoir/journal/poetry

  Re: we were at
« Reply #13 on: June 10, 2009, 02:09:49 PM » by Marc-Andre Germain
John,

Is there a particular reason for using the simple present tense in L5 when all the other are written in the past?

Otherwise, it all looks good, a smooth read.

Mark
Logged

  Re: we were at
« Reply #14 on: June 10, 2009, 02:14:27 PM » by Scott Douglas

excellent

it reminds me of when Paul Desmond was asked,
"how many of you are in the quartet?".

 
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